Hospitality, a.k.a. rediscovering spirituality.

A few weeks back I stumbled upon the videos of Ajahn Brahm’s (a British Buddhist Monk) talks on Youtube. This monk is known for his humour and wit which makes Buddhism accessible and approachable. His talks focuses more on how one improves oneself and has minimal aspects of RELIGION per se.

One of the best stories from the great monk is called “Opening the Door of Your Heart” inspired from what his father told him before he left home to become a monk. This story teaches oneself to make peace with one’s faults and mistakes, and instead of being ashamed of them, to “open the door of one’s hearts” to them, to make peace with all aspects, regardless of good or bad, of oneself.

When one accepts everything of oneself, there is no need for the constant endeavour to improve, and life becomes much more relaxing and peaceful. It is this hospitality that we give to ourselves, that we can liberate ourselves. And after opening the door of your heart to yourself, you extend that hospitality to others and open the door to them. According to Ajahn Brahm, people show you the side of them which you want to see, hence, if one sees kindness in another, kindness will be showed by the other to him.

#ajahnbrahm Hospitality

via Daily Prompt: Hospitality

Acts of folly

via Daily Prompt: Folly

More often than not, doing acts of sheer Folly now and then bring light and colour into our otherwise dull and boring lives.

For instance, a good friend of mine was having some troubles with the girl he was courting, and me being the nice chap I am, offered to offer my assistance as his draughtsman and strategist in ‘tackling’ that fair maiden of his.

One may ask, why do I even bother? And why would I mess with the lives of two lovers who have absolutely nothing to do with me? Well, my defence would be, I like to have fun and I sincerely wish to help others, especially friends of mine with their troubles if I have the leisure of time and the ability to do so.

If people were to regard me as nosy, I would plead guilty as charged, haha.

I believe that all these incidents will make good topics to be brought up during reunions in the distant future, and what is more, you’ll feel that you have made the lives of two better, and knowing that there are two less lonely people in the world is an extraordinary feeling.

Lastly, being the pious Buddhist I am, I strongly believe in the law of Karma, helping lovers get together, in my opinion are acts of kindness and hopefully some kind soul would do me the same in the future when I have such troubles.

Yours faithfully,

CHAIW KIN HOONG.

Conflict resolved

via Daily Prompt: Conundrum

Apologies for the long gap since the last post.

Boys, young innocent boys during adolescence, transform into or become hot blooded young men. Many would suggest that a boy leaps into manhood straight away after puberty, I personally feel that that is not the case.

I feel that before a boy becomes a man, he would have to go through the most difficult or challenging phase of his life, and that is the phase of being a ‘hot blooded young man’. In this phase, the challenge is not so much physical but more so emotional, it is inevitable that guys in this phase would develop strong feelings for members of the opposite sex, which is entirely natural and healthy, speaking biologically and psychologically.

What contributes to the challenge of developing such feelings is the misconception between the feelings of lust and love, on that I wish not to dwell too much upon.

I have never been in relationships with girls, but I have longed to. To be specific, there were two girls who troubled me deeply……and CONSECUTIVELY.

The first one I have known for three years maybe? Maybe the feelings I had towards her did sprout from lust, but I believe that it has gone passed that and maybe even into love. I wrote her a letter, (yes, who even writes letters these days?!) telling her how I felt. Writing the letter was a stroll in the park, actually giving the letter to her was hell.

It was indeed decent of her to reply, because I had feared that she may actually not even reply. Her reply was devastating as it is warm. She apologised, saying that she too has a crush on someone in her college, which I respect fully. I did not get the reply I wanted, but at least I got liberated. All I wish now is for all her best and to remain friends.

After so severe a blow to the head, recuperating, I thought I could finally stop falling for girls and allocate all my time and concentration towards my studies, I was dead wrong, haha.

I tried doing things to keep me occupied i.e. attending public lectures, talks, participating in moot courts. But soon again there came a strong tugging at my heartstrings by one of my classmates, this time the torment it caused me was way worse than the first.

I got false hopes that I might have a chance to successfully woo her, but a while later it came to my knowledge that she is already in a relationship with another guy, and such knowledge set a flame alight within my bosom. The details of this encounter I wish to keep private, hahaha because I am still not sure what my next course of action will be.

What I’m trying to say is, it is perfectly normal to experience these types of Conundrums which make you question yourself, whether you should fight on foolhardily or to gracefully withdraw from the race. Whatever your option, no one on earth can criticise that option for being wrong. Whatever your option, you grow, you understand how life works in its mysterious ways better. After quitting from two ‘races’ , and counting, I find solace in the fact that I have learnt to cope with losses and rejection, which is something that people should learn, failing which might lead to severe depression and even the tendency to commit suicide.

In short, embrace these conundrums, be mindful of such feelings, and once you get pass them, you’ll be sure to look back on them with a smile on your face.

Yours faithfully,

CHAIW KIN HOONG

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Image, one of the many waterfalls taken at Jiu Zhai Gou National Park, Szechuan China during my 2015 trip.

Banned Zone

via Daily Prompt: Banned

Some random thoughts~~~

The comfort zone, that is.

Cases and cases piling up to be read, there is of course the easy way out, by reading the case digests, which granted, is decent and healthy; but one can only get the most out of the case by reading the full judgments.

This applies to everything we do in life, take the more challenging route, ban yourself from your comfort zones, and you’ll find the final result even more satisfying. Trust me.

Re: Reading.

Just a few personal thoughts on READING, enjoy.

Throughout my childhood, I’ve not been a voracious reader, I don’t mean that I don’t read at all it’s just that I’ve had friends who read way more books than I had.

If my memory serves me well, I started reading the newspapers when I was 9, the age when a boy’s curiosity is at its greatest, but some years later, I stopped, not that the passion for reading has died, but the realisation that the mainstream media in the country is owned and controlled by the ruling party, and the quality of news in questionable, so I read the papers less, I glance through the headlines without reading much of the content, most of which is rubbish anyways.

Then came books, in my high school years, I started reading a few books here and there purely for pleasure, I was particularly fond of Chinese Wuxia Novels then , there were many books from this genre in my high school library. That library is a treasure chest, with many many books older than me, some limited editions not even available in the market.

It was when I started reading law that the importance of wide reading struck me. My A levels lecturer told us that if we were to do well in law, we must have a strong command of the English language, and only by reading you will improve your quality of language, both written and spoken. So I started to buy books, I bought Dickens, Austen, Homer, the Great American Novels, fictions non fictions etc. I didn’t have much money then, but I would usually by a few books at the beginning of each month, when I get my pocket money from my parents. Looking back, I have spent more on books than on food.

Of course, I still have a long way to go before  I finish reading all of them, but at least there are books to force me to read, and perhaps this liking of purchasing books is driven by the secret desire to have a private library? Many great men have had their own libraries, particularly well known to law students is the late Lord Denning, who noted how he has written books and poetry in his home library.

There is also no specific way how I buy books, I just go to any bookshop, head towards the literature section and pick up whichever book that catches my eye. Another way is to find out reading lists of famous people, such as T. Roosevelt and A. Lincoln, and try to get and read what they have suggested reading.

I read books with a much slower speed compared to the average person because I like to make notes in the books albeit reading them for mere pleasure. When I read, I keep a pen and a dictionary near me, just in case any unfamiliar vocabulary appears. I write my thoughts and mostly arguments in the books themselves. Yes I like arguing with the characters and the authors of books, and my books are always messy, with writings, scribblings, underlining etc all over the place. This is also another reason I like to buy my own books, where I can draw all over them and make them truly mine.

I strongly believe that having clean,neat books sitting on a shelf is not having book, that is having ink printed paper. If a person has a book which is worn and torn due to repetitive flipping and jotting down of notes he is considered to truly own a book.

 

 

 

Urgent

via Daily Prompt: Urgent

Haven’t been blogging for the past few days, due to a rather urgent piece of work due next monday.

Throughout the years, we were taught to differentiate between urgency and importance, and from what I’ve learnt, there are 4 categories.

  • Things that are urgent and important;
  • Urgent but not important;
  • Important but not urgent;
  • Neither important nor urgent.

I was taught at school some years back this method of categorising our various tasks in life and I find it to be quite useful a trick.

Perhaps you’d care to try it out for yourself.

Learn from a candle people!

via Daily Prompt: Candle

Image result for candle
Source: Google.

Thousands of candles can be lighted from a single candle, and the life of the candle will not be shortened. Happiness never decreases by being shared.
~~~The Buddha.

Candles provide light by sacrificing themselves.

Candles come in handy when your power fails.

Candles mark the growing of a person every year by an increase on a birthday cake.

Candles carry our prayers to our loved ones.

Candles make light, and where there is light, there is hope. Even in the darkest nights, fret not, as long as there is light, there is bound to be hope.